“INAUGURATION DAY” — A Bad Lip Reading of Donald Trump’s Inauguration
***You can turn these captions off and on using the CC button below It’s not so important Oh surprise! I have some pretzels for you! Melania, do you know what you just said? Wow, you’re cheery Me?- I’m always like this Oh yeah, sure You’re certainly not gonna be When can I see you walk away? You’re bad company I can’t wait You suck Now’s your chance…. call it off You can be a funny weiner, can’t you? I’m important You want to be me, don’t you Quite a figure, quite a figure No Looks like we have a problem Yeah, leave it to me We’re gonna squeeze him Hadouken! Hadouken to your face Ha-ruh-buh-buh-buh Ghhaaaa Ah! Are you wearing a big boy shirt? Yeah, I prolly never will again Help. I’m gonna barf You ever wash that wig? You got me again George! Good one That is a zinger! I like your nail polish, but not too much Now I pretend I like you But I hate you… inside You’re a creep I think you’re old like dirt Repeat after me: I make grease pellets in my sweat I make grease pellets in my sweat I was disappointed they didn’t find the continent of Atlantis yet I was disappointed they didn’t find the continent of Atlantis yet The new kid smells like falafel and wants to shave my mustache The new kid smells like falafel and wants to shave my mustache So did Aunt Belinda So did Aunt Belinda Shake hand You crushed it You think? Nope, I’m teasing you, you looked depressed I don’t feel good Now raise your shrunken hand and repeat after me: I gotta get a grip, you saw me squat I gotta get a grip, you saw me squat You think i won’t fling three eggs at you? You think i won’t fling three eggs at you? The goldfish of pre-teens never had a chance The goldfish of pre-teens never had a chance I personally have puked at a cage fight I personally have puked at a cage fight Then I chewed an awful lot of cheese Then I chewed an awful lot of cheese And I stored it in my gut And I stored it in my gut What’s your name? Together we will builf a bar in rural Connecticut And we will make it a bar with a nanny And we will make it a bar called “Brown Lady” And we will make it a bar that has stuff in it And extra good leather [singing] “When you want to make a bad day a greater day” “Then come to Brown Lady!” Now let’s party! No music, just me You know what I want later? A hamburger and Milk Duds And not fish Good old fun Yay? I’m also gonna need you to scrape my bunions Yes good The guy’s the boss, you know, so… Just remember who brought you here Thank you, my prince Thank you I WIN! You know, you might want to clean my car after this I mean, now I really wouldn’t call it yours, right? You gotta go back to the Jetta Pretty dorky! At least I still know how to drive I do not. I don’t do it. It’s why I got a big truck Gonna figure out a way to bury your stuff fast I’m burying your junk already Yeah, well that’s my past The kids made me a shiv, and I mean, I’m not afraid to use it Eyes up front You got a blade? Look straight ahead.